After i sold Is Anyone Up and started getting popular on twitter. I started driving up and having parties every other month in Reno, Nv. I’d get two suites next to each other and buy a ton of drugs and drinks and invite all my followers to the hotel and come party. My idea was really to give back to the fans and let them experience a party they could tell their kids about. Always the coolest mother fuckers came out. We’d get everyone sauced up and let them try blow for the first time and get dudes laid or whatever just give back.
The problem was that my boy Ray Ray had the best blow ever. I know everyone says that or they say they know a dude who knows a dude in the cartel blah blah. No this mother fucker got straight up yellow blow almost brown. The whiter the blow the more its cut. The problem with Ray Ray’s blow is that it makes you horny as fuck. You could fuck all night and cum 30 fucking times but it’s never enough. Going out and fucking the cement and dragging your dick against a wall is the only way to get pleasure.
My boy Wildcatbrodie was with me in this particular night, I had bought that shitty vodka that comes in that skull. You know what im talking about. never buy that shit. It is the cheapest vodka that tastes like a polish dude pissed in it. You get a cool bottle though. I tweeted that i was having a big party and for everyone in Reno to come threw and hit my dm for my number. People started mobbin and some really really cute girls come. It was a good ass night. At one point this 18 year olds about 4 of them got there and Wildcat hawked over them right off the bat. They wanted to try blow for the first time, so they get all sauced up and are bouncing off the fucking wall and let us blow lines off there tits back to back and brodie beat me. I’m not bragging but this is where we fucked up. There were four of them thats 4 tits with lines on them for me and 4 for brodie. BIG ASS LINES THOUGH.
So a little bit goes by and we were having a good ass time but fuckin lil ray ray’s cocaina had me having the biggest raging boner the whole night so i started drinking Makers straight to give me some whiskey dick so it could chill. Wasn’t really trying to fuck we had 3 days there (i thought). The weekend was going to be long. More and more people start coming to the party and wildcat was getting beyond sauced up and screaming and yelling shit and trying to fuck those four 18 year olds. Pretty sure he was creeping them out and they bounced, but this mother fucker hits up this hoe he wanted to smash right. She brings two friends one is a guy that i think is trying to smash the girl he wants to fuck and sure enough she wants to bounce and the guy she brought was being a straight hater and everything Brodie tried to do the fat friend would cock block. In the meantime i had these two girls come who were straight dimes who were at a rave or some shit and we were just vibin blowin a few lines and chillin.
Brodies hoe left after a while but no fear he calls up another one and she brings a friend too. Sure enough she was just straggling just leaching off my blow and i get upset because he is having a heart attack trying to fuck and were communicating all night because he wants to smash someone out quick. if you don’t do blow like this you won’t understand. It’s like having a demon trying to come out of you, it’s ripping your insides up you can hardly communicate and the only way to release this demon is threw the tip of your penis on some hoes pretty little face. You know gotta impower the bitches know its all the rage.
Alright so i kinda get mad and ask Wildcats new new hoe if she’s gunna fuck my friend she just laughed and then eventually bounces because i would bring up fucking him non-stop. Lil wildcat kinda got mad after a while so she bounced right but my two new friends i was chillin with earlier they invite a friend over and ask them to for Brodie to fuck right. The problem is this bitch was like 6’0 and 400 lbs and i’m being nice. I kick everyone out after a while, actually wait the pictures are still on my Instagram if you wanna peep it if the feds didn’t delete it or pretend someone hacked it.
I get the hot tub started and my two girls are in there doing blow with me and chillin and i lock wildcat and everyone still lingering in the other suite. I hella fucked up by spending the whole night trying to counteract my coke boner with whisky that when these girls wanted to start fucking around i couldn’t get it hard. So i get in the shower to sweat it out and get my dick hard but of course the fat friend wants to come in the room and kinda cock block but we were all having to good of a time to really pay attention. So we were naked in the hot tub and it was a pretty big hot tub and the fat friend wanted to get in and so she gets in but we could all fit so we just bailed and got towels and she was just sitting in there all fat lol.
My dick finally gets hard i just coke fucking the shit out of these hoes in front of the fat girl in the hot tub and i am going straight in like a mutant released from the wild. I fucked this hoe for like 4 hours. The problem is the fat girl wanted to fuck to so when i was fucking her friend from behind the fat girl comes up and starts licking my ass which is whatever felt bomb right and she does that for awhile and tries to get me to fuck her, so honestly i did for a second but hah whatever i’m a savage. Fat bitches are people too. So after awhile she gets the hint and goes into the other room and disappears thank god. I come out to get a drink or something about an hour later and shes naked sucking Brodies dick on the couch and he just gives me a thumbs up like a savage. Honestly i wanted to cry out of happiness because of i know how painful the demon he was dealing with is.
He grounds and pounds the fat hoe or her him whatever, and my hoes leave and it was about 9 am at this point and i still need to fuck but brodie was on another level. He comes up to me all serious and we were still doing blow at this point and is like “man i really need a favor dude”. I reply “what is it lil homie?, you seem sad and I’d like to cure you. Tell honey money your problem” he says “get me a hooker i need to fuck something now!!”. I could have said no but i understood. I said “can you just jack off?” he said “i did man still gotta smash”. I tell him “Ill get you one but i get to pick her”
I do this for all the homies but if I’m going to pay for you to fuck i get to pick her and she’s going to be the most fast disgusting creature i can find. He agrees and off i go. I make a little plate of 8 lines or so and get a beer and sit in the hot tub and get on redbook to find anyone who is up and willing to fuck my homie at 9 am. I find her. This fat disgusting meth head who was so fat in her default picture i couldn’t even find her face actually i don’t even remember what i was actually looking at but just look like a meth head or ex meth head. I wanted her to be as close to a zombie as possible. I did this on purpose i guess so i could write a story like this or talk about it on the podcast but now that can’t happen. awe sad face. She wanted $120. So i yell from where i was to the living room and giggly and shit “yeeeeeeeeee i found her!”. He’s like “show me bro come on show me” fuc that i wanted to surprise him.
I call her and I’m like “hey are you available” in her crack head voice “yeah $120 where are you!?” i say “i got $80 can you come now” hooker goes “yeah be there in 15”. She get’s to the room and i open the door all excited to see what i just ordered from the zoo. Haha Wildcat was so stressed but i could tell her was stoked to finally ground and pound. He was sitting behind the bar making a drink when i opened the door. She was honestly worse than her pictures. She was fat smelled like cheap perfume and old about 55 or so. So i start fucking with her and joking around with her and she see that skull vodka bottle and is like “OH SHIT! i collect these!” i was like “oh you can have that if you take $60 instead of $80” she didn’t even skip a beat and was like “hell yeah!” then i offer her some blow and she was like trippin.. “i haven’t done blow in years!” so she got all loosened up and i tell her “get naked lets get this started”. To be honest i didn’t and wasn’t going to fuck her but i still wanted to get slopped up.
She didnt have her front of bottom front teeth so i was thinking about getting all gummed up. So i get naked and she starts sucking my dick while Wildcat watched like i was fucking his girlfriend or something all sad haha. She still had her top on so we could exactly see what was going on with her body yet but i pop one of her nasty crackhead titties out to feel her and laugh.
I get my dick back and tell her to take her top off and fuckin hell man, she looked like a straight up living grub worm. You could even see her pussy. You know how grub worms have all those rolls and look like i dunno man you know what a fucking grub worm is she was that but a fat methed out one. So I’m “ewwwing” in my head and laughing and whatever and doing bumps and shit having a good ass time while wildcat is acting like i’m making him do this. So i was like “yo come get your dick sucked” mother fucker was just watching me the whole time lowkey gay. Honestly, this bitch sucked the best dick, maybe cus i was fucked up but she didn’t really have all her teeth it was so good and she would bite my gooch with her gums. Felt like a meth head was teething on my gooch haha. If the zombie shit really happened i’m ready. I’d just round up all the fine ass zombies and pull their teeth out and let them gum me up have like a whole theme park filled with them.
Alright so i got a call from my manager during this whole thing saying i got booked for a last minute party in New York. A private party paying retarded well. So we had to leave and get home by the end of the day so i hopped in the shower and let Wildcat to be slopped up. I had to run downstairs to check out and not pay for those other nights real quick so i bounce down stairs and handle shit all fucked up and then mobbed back to get in the shower. I walk into the room thinking he sent home the crack head because it took me like 30 minutes. Also thought if she was still there he was getting his dick sucked in the other room not mine. I walk in all fast to jump in the shower and this mother fucker had this fat bitches leg over her head and fucking the shit out of her. He didn’t skip a beat when he sees me and goes “life, man” and keeps pounding this bitch. So i go into the shower but i’m still basically in the room and the wall has all these mirrors and shit so i can see him pounding her out still. Not like in a gay way but because it was just funny as fuck to see. Then this mother fucker dirt bag of all bags can’t pass up taking a selfie with this bitch and pulls her off the bed and is taking a photoshoot while getting his dick sucked with her and taking videos and shit. So i just go about my day packing our shit and he just keeps fucking her and fucking her.
Finally it’s over and this bitch fell in love with him by the end of it. They add each other on facebook and she leaves. It was really adorable. So we gotta leave asap we’re all checked out and just gotta get the car. He drove us up there the problem is this fool was so fucked up he could hardly walk. I was like fuck it let’s go downstairs and get food and we get there and this fool has his phone out showing videos of him fucking the crackhead and pictures to anyone who looks and dying laughing and talking about how good her pussy felt and i tried to stop him but it was too funny. It was like he just fucked a supermodel or celebrity or something.
We finish breakfast and head to get his car and they go get his car for us. We drove there in this shitty lincoln from the late 80’s and he had two dui’s so it had that thing you had to blow into it so it would start. So i explained what was going on and how fucked up we are and how he has to blow into that thing to start it up for us and he agree’d and paid the parking attendant $40 to do it for us. Drunk driving is bad but we weren’t drunk we just were on drugs and that’s like being on redbull. We get on the highway and i didnt know how fucked up he was and he gets on the freeway and we’re mobbin for a good 10 minutes and then i notice we were drifting going 95 and the whole care is rattling and this full passed the fuck out and almost killed us. I was so pissed off for him lying about how fucked up he is that i didn’t realize we were driving the wrong way. So i get in the car to drive and i just kept driving and i drove in the wrong direction for 3 fucking hours until i realized what was going on.
That was the end of our adventure in Reno. That was one of the many time’s in Reno. It’s the classic don’t ever judge a book by its cover. Reno you have a special place in my heart and everyone who came and partied with us and all the good fucking times we had with the twitter homies and people from IAU. I miss you guy’s and your city.
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